I hope you do not mind me contacting you. I know you are disillusioned with Gnosis and I am not writing to you to ask you to reconsider leaving. However I am writing to you to ask you to continue to strive towards the path.
On the 4th of December last year I made a big discovery during the lunch hour on the retreat thanks to "good griend". After 22 years of research and study, the whole project of spiritual development was laid open to me and I comprehended the core of the truth of it.
This discovery concerns the true role of the elemental forces of nature.
All of creation is made up of them. The whole idea of self realization is completely bound up with them. They completely control the whole process especially who gets onto the path.
The central key to this whole project of self realization is _to earn the right to work with the elemental forces of nature_. After passing through the Guardian of the threshold test ( which determines ones understanding that we are not the sum of our ego's and our deliberate intension to work to surpass them) we are confronted the the tests of the elementals - this is the key area. Without passing these tests there is no further progress whatsoever. Everything rests upon this relationship between each person and the elemental forces of nature and most importantly how this relationship develops over time. This is precisely what Eliphas Levi and Franz Bardon were talking about in their works. Any spiritual school one belongs to must work in harmony with these forces or nothing will work. This is precisely what is happening to my friend "1st friens". I came across "1st friend" in 2003 and spent enough time working with him to understand what he is doing and how it all works or not - as the case is.
"1st friend" is an 11th degree AMORC member although his primary interest and practice is in the work of Dolores Ashcroft-Nowicki who has an organization called the Servants of Light (S.O.L.). This program is called Pathworking. It looks good but does not work because its fundamental premise is that the intellect must do the spiritual work. At best this is stagnation but this will over time build up into activating the Kundabuffer organ and then the practitioner will define themselves for the Abyss. Anyone who first build the faculties instead of dissolving the ego will almost certainly have the power of that faculty stolen by the ego which it will then use to supercharge itself and activate the Kundabuffer organ and then one will be truly stuffed - next stop the abyss. I know the difference between the left and right hand paths not because of someones writings or because of what someone has said. I know the what , the how and the why because I have been down that path myself and found out the hard way in the school of crash and burn. The two most common faculties people tend to pursue are the intellect and the astral plane. Developing ones faculties is best seen in the Harry Potter movies. The character Harry Potter always resorts to his faculties when in trouble and never asks for help from his Divne Being, the white lodge or any master. The world of Harry Potter is the dark side's ideal.
The intellect is a faculty and as soon as it takes control of one's spiritual development then it goes onto the dark path. It was very sad for me to realize that in Australia that there are already dark masters who have come out of the various Samael based Gnostic associations who were once on the true path. Fortunately there are not currently any in the movement although there could well be soon.
_As soon as one's intellect closes one's being off and takes control of one's spiritual development - the elemental forces shut one out of any relationship to them at all._
This is the bottom line. Humbling one's intellectual self in front of the heart mind of one's being is the absolute pre-requisite for any ambition for being on the path of self realization. A physical experience of one' being is the best way to work with because one knows when its working and when its not. One's intellectual pride and ones mystical pride are one's greatest enemies.
My personal position regarding the elemental forces is as one who has received the invitation to work with them but whose intellect is still too strong to take up their offer. I stand in the open door unable to pass through at this moment although after 22 years at this I shall pass though soon or I will die trying.
Since I have had to begin to prepare beginner talks, I have started to completely reassess my comprehension of everything regarding Gnosis. I have discovered that the process of exchanging intellectual comprehension for conscious comprehension is also governed by the elemental forces. Thus I believe what one knows about the light is what one has been let know.
_There is one other terribly important point regarding the elementals and that is the concept of balance_.
The path of self realization is the path of achieving a state of balance within oneself - balance or harmony between the elemental forces one is made up of. The process of Gnosis is really aimed at achieving this.
Alchemy is the process of working with the elemental forces to achieve the aims of Gnosis. _It is the activity or practice of working with the elemental forces for the purpose of balancing/harmonizing oneself.
_This internal process is the actual direct relationship between one and the elemental forces and this is beyond and group, book or other person. _It is one's personal responsibility alone and no-one whatsoever can interfere or even intercede on ones behalf_. If one hands over one's power to another for the purpose of achieving self realization - disaster can be the only result. The leaders of the movement especially "master friend" have done everything humanly possible to explain this in the best way that they know how. They can only provide a venue for discussing these things and have the hope something good comes out of it. There are many who have been in the group a long time who have not grasped any of this and there are unfortunately also teachers who also have not. This is nobodies fault as such because the conscious comprehension is such an etherial thing it is incredibly difficult to express in words.
I would just like to say that I believe that getting onto the path is still a viable option for you. I have a friend who has never been to the movement and would never consider coming to it but who has been building a direct and powerful relationship with the elemental forces for more than 25 years.
I wish you all the best with whatever you decide to do.